Moms!

Moms love exclamation points.

Undisputedly.

There is no use contesting/questioning it.

It’s in their genetic makeup. From the moment their first child leaves the womb and enters the world the first thing they think of is all the terrible shit they can text aforementioned child when aforementioned child is of age to have a cell phone and frame it around an exclamation point.
Examples include, “Call me if you need a ride!”



“Don’t stay out to late!”
“Have a good day!”
“I saw you driving!”

I’m by no means implicating that mothers of the world feign enthusiasm behind this little symbol of language, because I’ll be the first to tell you: Moms get wild – just not like they used to. To mothers of the world, the exclamation point has added symbolism besides, “Look at how excited I am!”; your mom means to also say, “I’m fucking old and look how excited I can still get!”. So respect it. The next time you get a text from dear old mom, make sure to include some exclamation points of your own. Try it out. You’ll know you left your god damn mom satisfied if, upon transcribing, your brief text to text conversation reads like you’re screaming at each other.